Dear Bobbybones

Marilyn Monroe would have turned 100 on 1 June. While somewhat belated, this post is to celebrate and remember her on the occasion of her birthday.

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Marilyn loved children but never had any of her own. While she became pregnant three times —all of her pregnancies occurred during her marriage to playwright Arthur Miller (1956-1961)— Marilyn had two miscarriages and one ectopic pregnancy. The first time she became pregnant was in the summer of 1956 during the filming of The Prince and the Showgirl; she got pregnant again a year later, but this pregnancy was ectopic and had to be terminated to save her life; and the third time occurred in 1958 while filming Some Like it Hot, with her miscarrying in December of that year. Marilyn had a severe form of endometriosis with often debilitating pain, and her fertility issues were most likely linked to the disease.

Although she had no children of her own, Marilyn had three stepchildren. She was married three times, and her second and third husband, respectively Joe DiMaggio and Arthur Miller, were previously married, with children by their former wives. Her stepchildren —Joe DiMaggio Jr, Jane Miller and Robert "Bobby" Miller— meant the world to Marilyn, and she once said they were her best friends. In a 1962 interview with Alan Levy for Redbook magazine, she candidly spoke about them: "I take a lot of pride in them. Because they're from broken homes … I can't explain it, but I think I understand about them. I think I love them more than I love anyone. I've always said to my stepchildren that I didn't want to be their mother – or stepmother – as such. I wanted to be their friend. Only time could prove that to them and they had to give me time. But I love them and I adore them. Their lives that are forming are very precious to me and I know that I had a part in forming them." 

1957, Marilyn with her stepchildren, Jane and Bobby Miller

After Marilyn married Arthur Miller in 1956, she became stepmother to Jane and Bobby, who were Miller's children from his marriage to Mary Grace Slattery. Miller divorced his wife on 12 June 1956 and married Marilyn that same month, on 29 June. Especially Jane, who was eleven at the time —Bobby was three years younger— had a hard time accepting her parents' divorce and her father's new wife. However, it wouldn't be long before Marilyn befriended both children, remaining close to them until her death. 

On 2 February 1962, Marilyn wrote to Bobby Miller in response to a letter he had written, showing great interest in Bobby's life while also sharing stories of her own life. She excitingly talks about her new house and the dinner party she attended the night before, where she discussed civil rights with Robert Kennedy. Marilyn was a staunch advocate of civil rights and had become more politically and socially aware since her marriage to Arthur Miller (read more in this post). At the time of the letter, Marilyn had been divorced from Miller for about a year but was nevertheless eager to keep in touch with his children and for them to visit her in Los Angeles. Sadly, however, she passed away six months later, on 5 August 1962, so perhaps they never saw each other again. (Incidentally, on the last day of her life, Marilyn reportedly spoke on the phone with her other stepkid, Joey DiMaggio Jr.) 

Source: Cursum Perficio

Transcript:

Noon

February 2 [1962]

Dear Bobbybones,

The first thing I want to say is that I am very disappointed that you don't get to have your telephone. I don't quite understand why it didn't work out, and I am very sorry, but remember that in a few years you will be able to do more things that you want. For instance, like having your own telephone. What I am trying to say is that you will be growing up and having your own responsibilities (even thought [sic] I still think, and agree with you, that it would be fun to have a phone and I can't see any harm in it, especially since I want to give it to you as your Christmas present, and you feel you have a need for it.) Anyway, Bob, cheer up. I would like to get something that would replace it, but I don't know how. I am glad you liked the sweater, but I would still like to do something else with your check because it really belongs to you. If you can think of anything else, let me know. Or, maybe you would like to start a savings account, or something like that? Or, who knows -- but you let me know.

That pool table that you told me about in that Danish hotel sounds great. Did I ever tell you that I can really play pool? I learned when I was about sixteen and it is something that you never forget. I don't understand why they don't let you in to play pool. Do they they [sic] think you are a delinquent of some kind just because you like the game? Maybe you could go over and take a friend when all those Danish sailors aren't there, like at some odd hour early in the morning, or maybe you could find out which odd hours those Danish sailors don't play. Anyway, don't give up the ship, if you know what I mean, because they might just say yes, as you put it, just to shut you up.

I am glad your arm is feeling better. Where are you going skiing -- but do be careful.

By the way, I don't think you're so bad about sending letters when you consider how bad I am. I'm very happy to have heard from you and don't worry about sending me a present because I realize your allowance is limited and you need it for school things and what not.

I am going to get that book you recommended; is it "Lord of the Flies" or "The Flees [sic]" ? I would love to read something really terrifying.

Bobby, I have the best news: I have just completely bought my new house. As I told you, it is an authentic little Mexican house, but it's got a gigantic swimming pool, and it looks just like Mexico. You would just love it. I have two guest rooms plus a large playroom, plus lots of patios, and a big Mexican wall goes all around the place with big high Mexican gates (that's to keep intruders out, in case anybody gets intrusive.) It's got a nice garden - not too large to take care of - and, as I told you, the swimming pool is so large it doesn't leave too much lawn to take care of. Anyway, I would love - for whichever vacation it can be arranged - if you and Janie wanted to - at least for a part of the vacation, even if it is for a few days, or a week - you are welcome to stay as long as you wanted to. I will take care of your plane tickets and meet you at the airport. You remember how much you liked California -- well, it's still here, and, what I want you and Janie to know is that you are always welcome. Now, I don't know how you are going to work this vacation thing out, but if I know you, you will probably figure something out - right? And, talk to Janie about it; maybe she has an idea. Or, if one of you is busy, you could take turns in coming. I don't know -- I just thought I would make these suggestions. First of all, I miss you very much and I think you would love my new home.

Oh, Bobby, guess what: I had dinner last night with the Attorney-General of the United States, Robert Kennedy, and I asked him what his department was going to do about Civil Rights and some other issues. He is very intelligent, and besides all that, he's got a terrific sense of humor. I think you would like him. Anyway, I had to go to this dinner last night as he was the guest of honor and when they asked him who he wanted to meet, he wanted to meet me. So, I went to the dinner and I sat next to him, and he isn't a bad dancer either. But I was mostly impressed with how serious he is about Civil Rights. He answered all of my questions and then he said he would write me a letter and put it on paper. So, I'll send you a copy of the letter when I get it because there will be some very interesting things in it because I really asked many questions. First of all he asked if I had been attending some kind of meetings. (Haha!) I laughed and said "no, but these are the kind of questions that the youth of America want answers to and want things done about." Not that I'm so youthful, but I feel youthful. But he's an old 36 himself which astounded me because I'm 35. It was a pleasant evening, all in all.

I am leaving today for New York so I'll call you when I get in. Maybe you could stop over for a visit or lunch or dinner, or, maybe you want to go to a movie. I'll be in New York for, I expect, about a week. Tell Janie all this and tell her I would love to see her. I haven't heard from her since Christmas. I guess we are all a little sloppy about writing. However, I think we all know what we mean to each other, don't we. At least I know I love you kids and I want to be your friend and stay in touch.

Say Bobsky, what happened about your math test? I don't know why I took it for granted, but I always thought you were sort of brilliant in math. Anyway, I hope that all your mid-term tests came out very well.

Well, I'll close now, since this letter is getting a little longer than I intended. Golly I'm sorry about the phone, but you will grow up before you know it and things like telephones will be possible and not out of your reach.

I love you and miss you, and, give my love to Janie.

P.S. 

My new address is 12305 Fifth Helena Drive, Los Angeles 49, California

Bobby Miller with his parents and sister Jane

Marilyn's last home at 12305 Fifth Helena Drive, located in the Brentwood neighbourhood of Los Angeles. It was at her home that she was found dead on 5 August 1962, making her letter to Bobby all the more poignant.

1962, Marilyn with Robert Kennedy (left) and John F. Kennedy (his back to the camera) on the occasion of JFK's 45th birthday party. While being the only known photo of Marilyn with JFK, it's possibly also the only known picture of her with Robert Kennedy.

 

She was like all Charlie Chaplin’s heroines in one

Elia Kazan met Marilyn Monroe, by his own account, on the set of Harmon Jones' As Young as You Feel (1951), a comedy in which Marilyn played a small role. The two would later embark on a brief love affair. At the time, Kazan —seventeen years Marilyn's senior— was married to his first wife, dramatist Molly Day Thacher (their marriage lasted from 1932 until Thacher's death in 1963). Kazan was a very close friend of playwright Arthur Miller and was the one who introduced Marilyn to Miller. Marilyn and Miller (the latter also married then) fell for each other immediately but wouldn't become romantically involved until 1955 and eventually married a year later. Marilyn and Kazan reportedly remained friends after their affair.

Top photo: Arthur Miller (left) and Elia Kazan were close friends until Kazan named names before HUAC (House of Un-American Activities Committee) in early 1952, thereby destroying their friendship. Marilyn Monroe was reportedly instrumental in reuniting them years later. After her death, the two men worked together on Miller's 1964 play After the Fall, which Kazan directed. Bottom photo: Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller who were married from 1956 until 1961. When they met, Miller was still married to Mary Slattery whom he divorced in 1956; Marilyn would marry Joe DiMaggio in 1954, only to divorce him nine months later.  

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Seen below are two telegrams and a letter written by Elia Kazan. First shown are the telegrams, sent by Kazan to Marilyn during their affair. Noteworthy is that the first telegram was signed "B", which stands for "Bauer". Kazan and Miller had adopted Marilyn as their "mascot" and nicknamed her "Miss Bauer" following a prank they had played on Columbia boss Harry Cohn. In a meeting with Kazan and Cohn —during which Kazan tried to sell Cohn Miller's script The Hook— Marilyn had posed as Kazan's private secretary Miss Bauer, without Cohn ever recognising her. 

Source: Bonhams

The following letter —not shown in full but the part that deals with Marilyn— was written by Kazan to his wife Molly Day Thacher on 29 November 1955. In it, the director confesses to his affair with Marilyn four years earlier. The "boy friend, or keeper" to whom Kazan refers was Marilyn's agent Johnny Hyde. Thirty-one years Marilyn's senior, Hyde was in love with Marilyn and even left his wife for her. Marilyn didn't return Hyde's feelings but did love him dearly and was heartbroken when he died on 18 December 1950 (a few days after production on As Young as You Feel had started). When Kazan met Marilyn, she was grieving over Hyde's death. 

In one sense it’s true to say that it meant nothing. On the other hand it was a human experience, and it started, if that is of any significance, in a most human way. Her boy friend, or “keeper” (if you want to be mean about it) had just died. His family had not allowed her to see the body, or allowed her into the house, where she had been living after the death. She had sneaked in one night and been thrown out. I met her on Harmon Jones set when I went over to visit Harmon. Harmon thought her a ridiculous person and was fashionably scornful of her. I found her, when I was introduced, in tears. I took her to dinner because she seemed like such a touching pathetic waif. She sobbed all thru dinner. I wasn’t “interested in her”; that came later. But I did feel terribly touched by her and did think she had a lot of talent. .... I got to know her in time and introduced her to Arthur Miller, who also was very taken by her. You couldn’t help being touched. She was talented, funny, vulnerable, helpless in awful pain, with no hope, and some worth and not a liar, not vicious, not catty, and with a history of orphanism that was killing to hear. She was like all Charlie Chaplin’s heroines in one. 

I’m not ashamed at all, not a damn bit, of having been attracted to her. She is nothing like what she appears to be now, or even appears to have turned into now. I don't know what she is like now, except I notice Lee Strasberg [Marilyn's acting mentor and friend] has the same reaction to her that I did. She was a little stray cat when I knew her, total possession a few clothes, and one piano. I got a lot out of her just as you do from any human experience where anyone is revealed to you and you affect anyone in any way. I guess I gave her a lot of hope, and Arthur gave her a lot of hope. She had a crush on Art, not me. I was more interested in her, especially humanly than he was. She is not a big sex pot as advertised. At least not in my experience. I don’t know if there are such as “advertised” big sex pots. I didn't have anything to do with her when I went out during the testifying. She was sleeping with [Joe] DiMaggio. She told me a lot about him and her, his Catholicism, and his viciousness (he struck her often, and beat her up several times). I was touched and fascinated. It was the type of experience that I do not understand and I enjoyed (not the right word) hearing about it. I certainly recommended her to [playwright] Tennessee’s [Williams] attention. And he was very taken by her. 

I’m not sorry about it. I don't think a man can go thru a life without lesions, faults, slips and all that. I have no will towards same, and I have no desire to harm you. .... I am human though. It might happen again. I hope not, and I have resisted quite some other opportunities. No loss. I got a lot out of this one, can’t say I didn’t. I think I helped her. I don't know the answer to all this. If you don’t like what I say and feel it necessary for your own sense of honor and cleanliness to divorce me, divorce me. ... I don’t think I should not be married or anything like that. If you divorce me, I’ll tell you plainly I will in time get married again and have more children. I feel I’m a family man and I want a family, and am a damned good one. I don’t care what your judgment is on that. .... Let me repeat: I had nothing to do with her getting into the Actors' Studio, or Lee Strasberg's classes. Nor am I coaching her, advising her, seeing her or cuddling her. I'm really weary of the whole subject just as you are. ....

Source: The Selected Letters of Elia Kazan (2014), edited by Albert J. Devlin.  

Above: Marilyn Monroe and Johnny Hyde pictured dancing at the Palm Springs Racquet Club on New Year’s Eve 1949. Below: Elia Kazan with his first wife Molly Day Thacher. After Thacher's death in 1963, Kazan remarried twice —to actress/director Barbara Loden (m. 1967 until Loden's death in 1980) and author Frances Wright (m.1982 until Kazan's own death in 2003).

I have such a strong, tender, wonderful memory

During four months in 1960, Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller lived in a bungalow at the Beverly Hills Hotel while the bungalow next door was occupied by their French friends, famed film couple Yves Montand and Simone Signoret. Miller had met Montand and Signoret in Paris in 1956, when the two starred in the play Les Sorcières de Salem, a French adaptation of Miller's own 1953 play The Crucible. (They would later also star in the 1957 French film version.) Miller became friends with the couple, sharing the same leftist political views. Several years later, in the fall of 1959, Montand and Signoret came to New York where Montand would enjoy great successes on Broadway with his one-man show An Evening with Yves Montand. It was then that the Montands also met Marilyn and eventually befriended her too.

While the two couples were living side by side at the Beverly Hills Hotel in bungalows No. 20 and 21, Marilyn and Montand were filming Let's Make Love (1961) and Miller was one of the writers working on the film's screenplay. Production of the film was plagued with difficulties, including the usual problems with Marilyn (her lateness and inability to remember her lines) and the fact that Montand didn't speak English, having to learn his lines phonetically. It is said that the issues Montand and Marilyn were each having during filming eventually caused them to bond. When their respective spouses left for other commitments, the two grew closer and started a much-publicised affair.  

The affair between Montand and Marilyn reportedly ended after shooting of Let's Make Love had wrapped. Marilyn's marriage to Miller was already in trouble when filming began and the two would divorce in early 1961. The Montands returned to France and remained married until Signoret's death of cancer in 1985. While Simone was very hurt and embittered by the affair and the scandal that followed, she never blamed Marilyn. In her autobiography Nostalgia Isn't What It Used To Be (1975) Signoret wrote:  

She never knew how thoroughly I had understood the story that was no one's business but ours, the four of us. Too many people were concerned with it during troubled times when many more important things were happening.

She's gone without ever knowing that I never stopped wearing the champagne‐colored silk scarf she'd lent me one day when I was being photographed. It went well with what I was wearing; so well that she made me a present of it. It's a bit frayed now, but if I fold it carefully, that doesn't show.

Marilyn was wracked with guilt after betraying the trust of her friend. After Marilyn died, Simone famously said: "She will never know how much I didn't hate her." Photos above and below by Bruce Davidson, Beverly Hills Hotel, 1960.

Below are a few pieces of correspondence, the first one a letter from Marilyn to Yves Montand written on 24 September 1959. Three days earlier Marilyn had attended the premiere of Montand's one-man show at the Henry Miller Theater on Broadway. Her escort mentioned in the letter was Montgomery Clift. 

Source: Cursum Perficio

Transcript:

September 24, 1959

Dear Mr. Montand:

First, I want to ask you to forgive me for not coming back stage the other night, but my escort was rather upset by the crowds and insisted we leave the theatre as soon as possible. 

I especially wanted to come back stage in order to give you my husband's deep regrets that he was not able to be with me on opening night (he had a deadline to meet). For myself, I want to tell you how marvelous you were and how wonderful it is that Americans will have an opportunity to see you.

When my husband does come to your performance I shall be there again. We are both looking forward to meeting you and Mrs. Montand at that time.

Warmest good wishes to you both.

Mr. Yves Montand

Algonquin Hotel

59 West 44th Street

New York City

__________

A Christmas card and drawing from the Montands to Marilyn. I don't know who was the artist here, Yves or Simone.

Source: Julien's Auctions

Simone and Yves sent Marilyn some flowers or perhaps left them at her bungalow when Marilyn was out. At any rate, the flowers were accompanied by the following card. 

Source: Julien's Auctions 

And a few lines from Marilyn regarding Montand. The lines were part of a P.S. in a letter she had written to her psychiatrist Dr. Ralph Greenson in 1961. Marilyn was reportedly in love with Montand, hoping against hope he would marry her. 

Source: Cursum Perficio

Now that we have made up...

One of my earlier posts (here) showed an angry telegram from playwright Arthur Miller to Billy Wilder. Wilder had publicly criticised Marilyn Monroe for her behaviour during the shooting of Some Like it Hot (1959), and in the telegram -dated 11 February 1959- Miller basically accused him of having contributed to Marilyn's miscarriage (which occurred shortly after production). That same day Wilder sent Miller a lengthy telegram back, saying (in part): 

"Of course I am deeply sorry that she lost her baby, but I must reject the implication that overwork or inconsiderate treatment by me or anyone else associated with the production was in any way responsible for it. The fact is that the company pampered her, coddled her and acceded to all her whims. The only one who showed any lack of consideration was Marilyn, in her treatment of her co-stars and her co-workers right from the first day, before there was any hint of pregnancy... Her chronic tardiness and unpreparedness cost us eighteen shooting days, hundreds of thousands of dollars, and countless heartaches. I recall one typical morning when she showed up two and a half hours late, carrying a copy of Thomas Paine's The rights of man, and when a second assistant director knocked on her dressing room door and humbly asked her if she was ready, her humanity shone through and she replied quote drop dead unquote. This having been my second picture with Marilyn, I understand her problems. Her biggest problem is that she doesn't understand anyone else's problems. If you took a quick poll among the cast and crew on the subject of Marilyn [you] would find a positively overwhelming lack of popularity." [source: "Arthur Miller" by Christopher Bigsby (2008)]  

Tony Curtis. Billy Wilder and Marilyn Monroe at a party for "Some Like it Hot". Curtis was also more than annoyed with Marilyn during production of the film. And his remark "Kissing her is like kissing Hitler" didn't really help matters between the two of them.

I don't know what happened after Wilder sent his telegram, but the two men apparently reconciled judging from Wilder's note to Miller several months later.

Source: heritage auctions/ image reproduced with permission

Transcript:

April 20, 1959

Mr. Arthur Miller

444 East 57 Street

New York, New York

Dear Arthur:

Now that we have made up (I hope!), I want you to read this stunning review of our picture. In case you don't read Hebrew, I suggest you have Elizabeth Taylor translate it for you.

My best to Marilyn.

Fond regards,

BW: RS

Enc.

*Note: Billy Wilder and Arthur Miller were both Jewish, and Elizabeth Taylor had just converted to Judaism earlier that month--hence Wilder's remark. 

On the set of "Some Like it Hot" with Billy Wilder, Arthur Miller and Marilyn Monroe

"You are an unjust man and a cruel one."

Production of Billy Wilder's "Some Like it Hot" (1959) started in August 1958. With a cast led by Jack Lemmon, Tony Curtis and Marilyn Monroe, the film would become Marilyn's biggest success. During filming, however, Marilyn was a disaster to work with. Wilder had already experienced problems with Marilyn while filming "The Seven Year Itch" (1955), but things were even worse during "Some Like it Hot". Production was held up for days, due to Marilyn's tardiness, absences, her inability to remember the simplest of lines (the line "Where is that bourbon?" needed forty takes), and fights between Wilder and Marilyn over creative issues. During this period, Marilyn's health had already begun to deteriorate, and she was also pregnant. In December 1958, Marilyn would suffer her second miscarriage.

Playwright Arthur Miller and Marilyn Monroe were married from 1956 until 1961. On 11 February 1959, Miller sent the following telegram to Billy Wilder, expressing his anger over Wilder's public attack on Marilyn after production of "Some Like it Hot". 

Photo: Billy Wilder and Marilyn Monroe on the set of "Some like it hot".

Via: mostly marilyn monroe

Transcript:

BILLY WILDER

10372 WILSHIRE BLVD LOSA=

DEAR BILLIE I CANNOT LET YOUR VICIOUS ATTACK ON MARILYN GO UNCHALLENGED. YOU WERE OFFICIALLY INFORMED BY MARILYN'S PHYSICIAN THAT DUE TO HER PREGNANCY SHE WAS NOT ABLE TO WORK A FULL DAY. YOU CHOOSE TO IGNORE THIS FACT DURING THE MAKING OF THE PICTURE AND WORSE YET, ASSIDUOUSLY AVOIDED MENTIONING IT IN YOUR ATTACK ON HER. FACT IS, SHE WENT ON WITH THE PICTURE OUT OF A SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY NOT ONLY TO HERSELF BUT TO YOU AND THE CAST AND PRODUCER. 12 HOURS AFTER THE LAST SHOOTING DAY HER MISCARRIAGE BEGAN. NOW THAT THE HIT FOR WHICH SHE IS SO LARGELY RESPONSIBLE IS IN YOUR HANDS AND ITS INCOME TO YOU ASSURED, THIS ATTACK UPON HER IN [sic] CONTEMPTIBLE. I WILL ADD ONLY THAT SHE BEGAN THIS PICTURE WITH A THROAT INFECTION SO SERIOUS THAT A SPECIALIST FORBADE HER TO WORK AT ALL UNTIL IT WAS CURED. SHE WENT ON NEVERTHELESS. YOUR JOKES, BILLIE, ARE NOT QUOTE HILARIOUS ENOUGH TO CONCEAL THE FACT. YOU ARE AN UNJUST MAN AND A CRUEL ONE. MY ONLY SOLACE IS THAT DESPITE YOU HER BEAUTY AND HER HUMANITY SHINE THROUGH AS THEY ALWAYS HAVE=

ARTHUR MILLER=