Stars and Letters: You have upset me so that I could die

14 March 2021

You have upset me so that I could die

Before Grace Kelly married Prince Rainier of Monaco in 1956, she was romantically involved with famed couturier Oleg Cassini and was also said to have been engaged to him. Cassini, who was once married to Gene Tierney (from 1941 to 1952), was responsible for creating the famous Grace Kelly look. The fashion designer said that Grace dressed "like a school teacher" when they first met, so he encouraged her to "put a little sex in her clothes".

Since Grace's strict Catholic parents didn't consider Cassini a suitable match for their daughter (being a playboy and a divorced man), the relationship between the two eventually fell apart and not long thereafter Grace got engaged to Prince Rainier. About her break-up with Cassini Grace was later quoted as saying: "Do you realise if my mother hadn’t been so difficult about Oleg Cassini, I probably would have married him? How many wonderful roles I might have played by now? How might my life have turned out? That one decision changed my entire future.”

During their relationship Grace wrote several (love) letters to Cassini, two of which are seen below. The letters were written in 1954 when the actress was staying at the Hotel Bel-Air in Los Angeles while promoting her latest film The Country Girl (for which she would later win her only Oscar). The second letter is especially interesting, with Grace reprimanding Cassini for being jealous of Bing Crosby, her co-star in The Country Girl and later High Society (1956). Grace told Cassini that Crosby was just a good friend, so there was no reason for him to be jealous. It has often been said that Grace and Crosby did have an affair during production of The Country Girl and that he even proposed marriage. (If this were true, Grace naturally wouldn't confess to it in her letter to Cassini.) Incidentally, Crosby was dating Kathryn Grant at the time, whom he eventually married in 1957.

Transcript:

Thursday Night

Darling-

How lovely it was to come home and find your flowers. We are watching Charles Boyer on television - and as much as I love him I can only think of you - I don't understand how such a thing could happen —

The last few days have been so hectic at the studio that I haven't been able to write all the things I have wanted to tell you — and even if I could it would be impossible as I think of you constantly -

The few minutes we speak each night are so wonderful for me - but I'm sorry I sound like an idiot -

Had lunch with [producer William] Perlberg and most of his crew- He was telling me about the two previews of Country Girl - apparently they were most successful and we all came off very well - I should be able to see it in a couple of weeks —

There are so many words for tomorrow that I will say good-night in order to be able to get a few of them right -

I think I'd rather have a ring instead of an automobile.

I love you -

Transcript:

Sunday -

Darling -

You have upset me so that I could die — I just don't understand your attitude -

It is incredible to me that having dinner with Lizanne [Grace's younger sister] and the Crosbys can make you behave like a schoolboy - If I went out with Bing alone you would be absolutely right - and I would never do that to begin with - Because I have no interest in anyone but you - but this I shouldn't have to explain -

Bing is a wonderful person and a very dear friend. I have great respect for him and I hope he will be our friend for many years -

I told you he said that he was in love with me- but there are many people that he feels that way about - and after the emotional strain of playing Country Girl - this was only natural - But Bing would never try to do anything about it - unless he thought I wanted it that way -

I have very few friends here - please don't ask me to give up their friendships -

Source of both letters: Harper's Bazaar